Just as we no longer find it appropriate
to tempt our weak-willed colleagues with sweets
(or risk killing those with peanut allergies)
and thus last year banned everything but fruit
from the break room (and really–carbs–hello?),
we can no longer tolerate undone tasks.
Please volunteer whenever someone asks.
If you feel too busy (and only you would know),
you might consider sleeping slightly less
or drinking more caffeine. Or barring those
perfectly adequate solutions, you might
get a sitter and have a fun date night
with colleagues. If you don’t pitch in, someone
who’s really overworked will be forced to get it done.
Relocate the dueling laptops to a bed and that is my life.
I think you should scale back on how amazing you are.
Because you’d still be freaking amazing, even if you scaled way back.